A Bowl of Emotions

By z_l3nG


I can still taste the words on my tongue, and they're slowly dissolving in my mouth.

They were so coated with sincerity that I would not forget, in at least another two years.

Those words...
they were wonderfully crafted into sentences so as to cushion the pain that might further stir up my emotions.


Sad, but true, that there was a rather thick mixture of sadness and negativity in the bowl of emotions that day.

I wasn't aware of it. I couldn't even taste it.

"Is it that obvious?" I wondered, as I sat through the interview-turned-lecturing session, and if the session had gone even more in-depth, it'd turn to a therapy or soul-searching session, minus the consultation fee.


"You're such a lovely person, but..." the interviewer in her late 40s said, carefully selecting her words.

"I don't know you from Adam's till today, but..." yet, another sign of hesitation, fearing that the next few words might offend me in someway.

"You look sad and full of negativity," she finally uttered the words she had had in mind.


She flung those words at me, like a huge piece of thick dough slammed to my face.

I didn't suffocate, but I did feel a pinch of embarassment.

However, I was purely thankful for such honesty.


No denial, not today, I told myself.

It's reality check day, mate.

And so, I nodded. "Yes ma'am," I said.

She continued sprinkling spoonfuls of wise words....


As for me, I felt as though there were many punches thrown at me and all I wanted to do was just to run away.

How much longer can I take the punches? I asked myself.

After all, I'm just a common mortal.



The punches, which I soon realised, were my anxiety, my insecurity.

How do you stop anxiety?

Nip the problem in the bud, that's how it's done.


"I know you have dreams, but do not know how to go about achieving them, maybe that's why you're feeling insecure," she gently put into words, with a touch of sensitivity. "Sort out your dilemma."

Iron it out? How? It sounded so easy. But, how?

Nip the problem in the bud.

As easy as it may sound, it's the hardest thing to do.

It's Fight or Die.


I'd better start trying now before it gets too late, before my soul deteriorates even more.

It's already getting so obvious that even a perfect stranger could effortlessly sense it.